Happy Halloween, er uh...Thanksgiving!

So, I have had these photos for a few weeks, but with the busy season lots of things have been neglected, things like my own photos, my blog, and the dishes. (Although I don't care much about the dishes.)

This year we got to go trick or treating on Mr. J's birthday. He was super adorable in his racecar driver costume. He was so excited about wearing it, in fact he did for a few weeks before the big day. Memmy chose to be a witch again. She was a witch when she was 2. I always hope they will choose something new and exciting, but I also love for them to choose for themselves, so a witch she was. A cute and adorable witch at that. Zilly was Little Bo Peep. Oh my goodness, I just want to kiss on her all day long. That little face of hers. Gah.

We went and visited grandparents that day, and went trick or treating at the mall. Where are those photos you ask? Well, I only brought the Polaroid and my lens broke after the first photo I took. I was SO bummed but super thankful that I had taken these shots before leaving.

When we got home that night all prepped to make Jobb's cake, but he got sick...SUPER sick for a few days and we weren't able to make his 'cake' (really brownies that he chooses every year...) until a few days later.

Here he is feeling MUCH better and ready to blow out his seven candles:

Love you buddy. Hope this is one of your best years yet.

Next first steps.

(you like my new film camera? my new bff! contax 645 fuji 400h)

I know you think the title of this post is about her, but it isn't. It is about her mom. Her mom that isn't quite sure how to take the next few steps in her life knowing that she won't be a new mom again during this life. EVER. It is making her mom very sad, and her mom is having a hard time with that. Silly I know, but true nonetheless.

In case you were wondering, her mom is me. :)

Isn't she just the cutest thing? Oh my goodness how I have loved and enjoyed her.
(Please note the chalk all over her...and her adorable chalk art on our driveway.)

I think the big birthday celebration last week, with Millz turning one threw me for a little loop I wasn't expecting. I wasn't expecting to have such a joyous occasion bring a little bit of tears and depression to my heart. It did, but I am getting over that. It is just par for the course. Big days bring big realizations that she is our last little nut. She isn't quite taking her own first steps yet. Although she took 6 outside yesterday because she was desperate to play with the neighbor's dog.

So, anyway, back to me. I just don't know how to take the next first steps in my life. The steps out of family building and into family rearing. I know I have been doing that all along for the past six years. But this? This is a different feeling. Instead of planning on how to get the next child here, we are now planning on when the last child enters school, then what will I do? I am not wishing time away, but minds naturally go that route. Ahhhh.

I just want to freeze time. Freeze these moments with my three babies and keep them this size for twice as long. I wish the days were longer only to have more time to kiss their cheeks, rub their sweet feet, read to them. More time for that and less time for all of the other garbage would be blissful. Perhaps those need to be my next first steps. My first steps into being a better mother with nothing to worry about except them! I am going to work on that.

One.

beautiful image by jonathan canlas. (thank you.)

I can't believe you are one my sweet girl.
You complete us.
All of us.
You were worth every tear.

Thank you for your constant smile, and all of your sweet kisses.
Love you sweet baby.

"Hey kids, guess where we are?!"

"Disneyland!"

Best kept secret of the year. Really.







I wish I had more photos from the day. Hubbs took some with his piece...I literally took like 10 the entire day. I didn't want to have to babysit my camera, and well...within the first 10 minutes of our being there it POURED. And after that I did not feel much like shooting our grody selves.

We were soaked (so much for our cute hair for pictures), our stroller was SOAKED, our food was SOAKED...but it was SO much stinking fun, so so so worth it. The kids didn't even notice the rain.



Poor Hubbs, natural curl+rain=curlz. I think he is adorable. Love his face here.



Making a wish in Minnie's well.



Memms LOVED seeing Minnie. J-Dawg not sure what to think here.



It is so cute how they just ran up to Mickey. Memms didn't want to leave him. Mickey, in his Fantasia attire even did a little "Happy Birthday" ditty for Memms. It was so so so cute and adorable. She loved him.

The kids favorite rides?

J-Man: Peter Pan (the longest line of the day)
Memms: The Matterhorn (she said she liked the one with the scary mosters the best. Way to go Abomidable Snowman!)
Hubbs: The Matterhorn (I think he liked Memms reaction to it the best, I rode with J-Man, he was a little freaked too.)
Mine: The Carousel (Because we could all ride together and the look of wonderment in J-Man's eyes as he rode was the best gift in the world)

Definitely a place of magic. It was a day of magic for all of us. So thankful to have been able to take them there!

Just got back...

...from the happiest place on earth. Also other parts of California and Las Vegas. I can't wait to share all about our wonderful week. I am really good at keeping secrets. My kids didn't even know where we were going until we walked through the gates at Disneyland, and Memms looked up and saw "Tinkerbell! Look mom, TINKERBELL!" and we broke the news and they were in complete bliss the entire day. It feels good to be back, to be home.

For now, I must catch up on some work and laundry, and apologize for not being a very good blog friend, reader, and commenter for the past two months. I have wanted to, but I have had this overwhelming feeling and NEED to immerse myself in my little family.

I no longer chat on instant messenger, I hardly ever text anymore...EVER, I keep my phone calls limited, I don't spend a lot of time online anymore. I feel really good and really happy about all of it, but at the same time, I miss my friends from blog world. I am ready to make a new schedule, to include a little more of the things I love to do (like blog reading). Can't wait to see what you have all been up to!

Happy Birthday

Two of the best things to ever happen to me!





Happy third Memms! Happy thirty first Hubbs!

"They say it's your birthday!"

This birthday was one of the best I have ever had, really and truly. I am so thankful for everyone who made it so freaking wonderful.

It started out with Hubbs taking me and the kids out for lunch...anywhere I wanted. I chose the Ho Ho Gourmet. Remember that was also J-Man's choice? Like mother like son. If you live near Salt Lake County you MUST go there. It is THE most ghetto looking place on the planet...it looks like something straight up out of 1967 inside, but the food is divine, and if you go for lunch you can feed FOUR of you for $12.00. Yes, we walked out of there STUFFED for under $15.00. It was BLISS. I enjoyed my usual chicken teriyaki while Hubbs enjoyed his usual orange chicken. Mmm, I want to run there right now.

Then we picked up a sitter and went to the movies, we saw Valkyrie. Even though I can't stand, as in CAN'T STAND Tom Cruise...(even though when I was in high school I had a really steamy dream that involved him...) it was a WONDERFUL movie. I highly recommend.

We didn't have a lot of time to get the sitter home, so we nixed dinner and went home and, well you know the rest...next year I will save the coppers a slice of cake.

The next morning we had breakfast with my mom and all of my sibs. It was totally awesome. I got so many fun cards and gift certificates, I felt like a queen. Really, I couldn't stop smiling. They meant so much to me. Even this week I got two cards with little certificates in them for here or there and I am just so happy. Thank you to everyone for thinking about me, it was the best EVER.

A few days later I went out to eat with two of my besties. They treated me to a lovely...yummy meal at Johnny Carinos. If you haven't had their Rosemary Chicken, you MUST try it sometime. Divine. I felt like a princess having my friends buy me dinner. Then we ladies tripped it on over to my fave store Target. We had fun rummaging through the dollar bins, I was super excited to spend my $20 I got for my birthday from my mom...when my sweet friends hand me a card with a giftcard to none other than...my favorite store. I had to fight back the tears. I can't tell you how much this meant to me. Money has been tight around here for months and months. I have happily gone without so many things, and truly it hasn't bothered me, but to be able to buy myself (with the help of my friends) a beautiful sweater and some killer heels...it just meant so much. Much more than I can ever express to them. Thank you.

Then the best ever...cupcakes. The ladies found a cupcake shop (hello divinity) and picked up some rocking flavors. You must visit this website and shop, the story behind it will make you weep.

Me enjoying a milk chocolate with orange frosting. Yummylicious.






Leish's Red Velvet.



Linds and her Carrot Cake.



The unwrapping.



The eating.



And mrs. r in all her glory downing the Vanilla in one fail swoop.




I hope to have many, MANY more of these. Just like this one.

Bad Boyz

My husband, who also happens to be a real estate consultant would probably not exactly approve of the following story (it may or may not drive down the value of our home in an already dwindling market).

So, I tell this story hypothetically speaking of course...because it is just too funny not to tell.

The scene: My birthday. It was last Friday. I turned 27. Ah bliss. It was a great day, a story I shall share at a later date.

Hubbs had so sweetly stayed home from work so that he and I could do some cuddling on our couch...and other places that night. I was super excited. We were downstairs watching some show or another when, at some OBSCENE hour of the night, it was close to eleven...we hear the doorbell ring. What the H? We both look at each other with raised brows. Hubbs, who was half dressed ran to our room to get some clothes on and answered the door. It was our neighbor.
He was ringing to inform us of the drug bust currently happening OUTSIDE OUR FRONT DOOR. Literally.

The story: Apparently the COPS were chasing this guy down the busy street adjacent to our home, a very speedy chase I might add, when Bozo the driver decided to turn down our street to try to lose the police in the neighborhood. Tee hee...guess what? We live on a freaking DEAD END. "Private Lane" as I like to refer to it. The idiot drove through our neighbor's sideyard fence and landed the front end of his car in another neighbor's backyard. The guy gets out of his car LEAVING HIS GIRLFRIEND...and makes a run for it. I am not sure if the cops responding had one too many donuts or what, but he got away, leaving his girlfriend to be handcuffed and put in the back of the car. Nice.

It is nice to know I have two awesome neighbors, one who ran after the dood with a bat, the other with a piece of wood. They didn't catch him either.

Good times I tell you. Good, good times.

Five. Five Dolla'. Five Dolla'...Okay, just FIVE.

He. Is. Five.

5

We had a wonderful day. We woke up singing the Happy Birthday song, and the kids played and played all morning.



Around lunch time he opened his present:





He was THRILLED!

Then he told me while we cuddled on the couch during Memm's naptime, "Mom, I really need a little brother. I promise to be nice to him. " He. Is. Darling.

Earlier this morning I asked Mr. where he wanted to go out to dinner. He could pick ANYWHERE he wanted. All his choice. He said to me, "Um, I think I might like to have Chinese food." I was floored and laughed so much. So, tonight, we went out for Chinese food:
















He loves the chopsticks, and surprisingly he is REALLY good with them.

Hubbs' mama gave the kids balloons for the special day. Our little family has this thing with balloons. It started when J-Man was a baby, we have always sent them up for "Papai do Ceu" or for Heavenly Father. I think it was a convenient way for us as parents to avoid the choking hazard and the tears and crying when the balloons finally lost their float. Either way, it has become a really fun tradition for us. When we lost Peanut, one balloon began going up for Peanut and one for Papai do Ceu. It brings tears to my eyes just thinking about it. After reading Nie's balloon flights, it means even a little bit more. We sent up a little prayer for her family tonight too...





I love how excited they get when they watch them fly away.



Mr. Cutie Pants decided that we NEEDED some toys on the cake. "Sometimes Mom, there are toys on cakes. You know?!" So he ran and grabbed some of his recent favorites. A Transformer, the baby from the FP Dollhouse, and "Dragony".





Little Sis is starting to realize that birthdays are special and not for EVERYONE on that day. She was pretty upset and a little jealous. Mr. J was such a sweetheart to her all day, making sure she knew she was loved and included.



Make a wish! ("I wished for that I had one of 'Megatron'...and now I have one! Thanks Mom!")

I dunno if other parents endure these feelings when their first born turns five. I don't feel like I have been a mother for five years. That just seems crazy. I know it seems overly said, but really it has been the most remarkable five years of my life. He has brought me SO much joy. The things he says, the things he does, the way he is learning and growing each day surpasses my amazement. J-Man, you are an incredible artist. You have such an eye for beauty and for seeing the world in a new and different way. I really hope that you never lose sight of that. I hope you can always hold onto these qualities, and that I, as your mother can always encourage your growth, your learning, and your understanding, and that I can encourage you to do the things YOU want and LOVE to do. Keep doing such good things sweet boy. You are my heart!

"2" cute, "2" funny, "2" beautiful, "2" smart, "2" silly, "2" adorable...

I think that "2" might very well be my favorite birthday. For that reason! We spend the whole week thinking of things that they are "2"! OOooooooo squeeeee. I love this little girl. This is her new "give me a big smile" face and I LOVE IT! I could just eat her up! So thankful to have her here, even after her rocky start...just so thankful for her! And as for this man. Can't think of anything cute to say about "30". Hmmm, maybe "30" headaches, "30" gray hairs, "30" inch waist, "30" something, "30" thousand dollars...I dunno I am reaching here. But honestly, he is THE love of my life. I hope you had a good day sweetie! I don't know where I would be without you!
...but seriously, would love that "30" inch waist of yours!

Love, Me!